THE
PRISON OF RESENTMENT
Bob Mumford [1]
The
Greatest Hindrance to Spiritual Maturity
CONTENTS
I want to teach you tonight on the subject of "the
greatest hindrance to your spiritual maturity." Now that's a big
statement, and I am presupposing that first, you understand and possess
a basic salvation experience; second, have been baptized in water; and third,
you've been filled with the Holy Spirit. In addition, you ought to believe the
Word of God. Now, if you qualify in these areas, then we're ready to go.
Where are we going? We're moving toward the fullness
of God's purpose in the earth.
Ern Baxter has
often made a statement that I trust will shock you a little. He says,
"God’s goal and God's purpose must be accomplished through the Church,
which is His Body." In other words, all God has is you!
Now, that's a miracle. And if God's going to do
anything through us, it's going to take a miracle, isn't it? Every time I see a
measure of unity, or any degree of spiritual success, I say, "That proves
the deity of Christ and the supernatural nature of the Church of Jesus
Christ." If He left the future entirely to us, there probably wouldn't be
any.
Now, as I said, I want to touch on what is probably
the greatest hindrance to your going on in God. In the twenty-two years I've
been in ministry, I've counseled thousands of people, and also observed the
Lord's workings in my own life. I've seen spiritual highs when God poured forth
His Holy Spirit and His love upon His people; but t always my burden comes back
to this: "Not all that start the race finish it."
If God has something for our lives, accomplishing
that purpose presupposes that as men and women of God we must get from where we
are to where we ought to be-and that is usually the most difficult part. How
many of you ever failed the same test nine times? Anyone besides me? Many times
I've thought, "Dear God, I don't mind going through difficulties; but when
I go through the same one eight times .... " But God wants us to get past
every hindrance, so that we can go on into His purposes for us.
With our subject in mind, then, I want to read from
Galatians 5, beginning at verse 13:
For you were called to freedom,
brethren; only do not turn your freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but
through love serve one another.
For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, in the
statement, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." But if you
bite and devour one another, take care lest you be consumed by one another.
But I say, walk by the Spirit,
and you will not carry out the desires of the flesh.
For the flesh sets its desire
against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in
opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please.
But if you are led by the
Spirit, you are not under the Law.
Now the deeds of the flesh are
evident [King James Version says, "the works of the flesh,"] which
are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife,
jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissension, factions,
envying, drunkenness,
carousings, and things like these, of which I forewarn you just as I have
forewarned you that those who practice such things shall not inherit the
But the fruit of the Spirit is love,
joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
gentleness, self-control;
against such things there is no law.
Now those who belong to Christ
Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
If we live by the Spirit, let
us also walk by the Spirit. [This last verse lists the three particular
Christian sins. Listen to them.] Let us not become boastful, challenging one
another, envying one another (Gal. 5: 13-26, NAS).
Now look back with me at verses 13 and 1,1, and let me
establish something in your thinking. The apostle says this: You have been
called to freedom, brethren, only don't (mil your freedom into an opportunity
for the flesh, but learn to serve one another through love.
Then, verse 14, which never ceases to astound me:
"For the whole Law is fulfilled in one word, You shall love your
neighbor as yourself." I used to read that and think, "Paul, you
missed it, man. You missed it. Listen, Paul, I don't like that part. I don't
mind the part about loving God with all my heart and strength and mind and
soul. That's who I want to love. But can't we skip this other part?"
How many of you know it is
easier to love God than it is to love people? In the past, when I would want to
get spiritual quick, I'd say, "Lord, I love You, I love You, I love You.
"
Then one day the Lord said,
"That's nice, but did you hear the other part of the verse?"
I said, "No, Lord! Not
that!"
The whole Law is fulfilled when
you learn to love your neighbor as yourself!
Now listen. will you? Even if this is a little bit
painful. will you hear me out, please'? Do you know what I am beginning to
understand? Righteousness is relational. If you want to be
righteous before God, you must get all your relationships clear. First, we get
rightly related to God, and then He gets us rightly related to everyone else.
You hear people say,
"I got rightly related to Cod. I found Jesus as my Saviour.
I got forgiven, cleansed and regenerated; then I was baptized in water, filled
with the Holy Spirit, and got a new Bible."
Then somebody says to them:
"That's good. What are you going to do now?"
"Now nothing! I'm
righteous. There's now no condemnation! I'm a Christian – born again. It's me
and the Lord now."
And God says, "But wait a
minute. How is the whole law to be fulfilled?"
Now when I went back to look at the Ten Commandments,
do you know what I found? Four of the of commandments concerned man's
relationship to God. Six were for our relationships with one another:
“Don’t kill," "don't envy," "don't lie," etc.
For me, the problem wasn't with my relationship with God: my problem was with
people. And in order to experience true righteousness, I need to be in right
relationship with those with whom God has put me.
From the Ten Commandments, I went to the Beatitudes.
You know what the Beatitudes are, don't you? The Be-attitudes. And I began to
read, "Blessed are the poor in spirit, blessed are the meek, blessed
are the peacemakers. "
I said, "Sure, Lord, that
means peace between You and me."
He said, "That's what you
think!"
"Blessed are the peacemakers." How many of
you know, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall get their eyes
scratched out"? If you've ever tried to be a peacemaker, you know how true
this is, and how much it costs you to be one. But the concept of peacemaker is
relational because the problem is not between us and God. It's between us and
us.
When I began to take up my whole Bible, with the
concept that righteousness is relational, it was as if scales fell off my
eyes. I began to read the Scriptures like God intended for us to read them.
Everywhere, in every book and every place in the Bible, we are continually and
unceasingly admonished to relate properly to one another. "Avoid jealousy
and envy, challenging and boasting." "Quit being critical and
judgmental and acting superior." They're all dealing with how we relate to
people.
Once when I came home from an extended time of
ministry, my wife said, "How are you doing, Honey?" I said,
"I've been peopled." Have you ever been "peopled"? That's
when you just want to say, "God, take them. Who needs them? I'll be a
hermit. I'll just take my Bible, retreat to a quiet place and pray and sing in
the Spirit. Just read and memorize the whole Bible."
The Lord said, "That isn't
righteousness. Thai's asceticism. That isn't the game. The name of the game is:
You must get enough of God to enable you to get rightly related to them!”
I said, "In that case
Lord, I need a lot more of You."
Come on now. You sure are quiet. I like you quiet.
It's like when the sprinkler is going - it's all soaking in.
Let's look at two scriptures-one from Matthew 5 and
one from Matthew 6-which many of us neither believe nor really apply in our
Christian lives. Let's take Matthew 5:23-26 first. Now this is the Mumford
version:
If therefore you are presenting
your offering at the city arena at
leave your offering there
before the altar and go your way, first be reconciled to your brother ...
["I don't need my brother, I need God!" Right? Wrong!]
Make friends quickly With your
opponent at law while you are with him on the way; in order that your opponent
~ay not deliver you to the judge, and the judge to the officer, and you be
thrown Into, prison. [I want you to remember that. We II come back to this.]
Truly I say to you, you shall.
not come out of there, until you have paid the last cent.
Now what does that mean? It means that I've gotten in
a hassle with my brother, but 1 don't want to go to him to straighten it out. 1
say, "I don't want to go to him. I don't need that. "
But the Lord says, "If you have been quickened by
the Spirit to get right with your brother and if you don't, I'll see to it that
you get put into jail. And when the officer puts you in the prison, you don't
get out until you pay. "
Now let's look at Matthew 6, verse 12: "Forgive
us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." That's the only part
of the whole Lord's prayer on which Jesus gave commentary. Notice what Jesus
said about verse
You say, "You mean to tell me that forgiveness
is conditional?" Not when you're getting saved, but where your brother is
involved-yes, it is conditional.
Someone said, "Brother, I want you to know Jesus
loves me just like I am."
My reply to that is, "You can be sure He. does.
But He doesn't want to leave you like that." He does love you. You come to
the Lord and say, "Lord, I am a sinner; forgive me!" And He'll do it.
But following that experience, He says, "Now, get up, I want to
talk to you." His vital message is:"
'righteous' means you're rightly related to God and also rightly related to
your brother."
Remember, all of the law is fulfilled in this: .. Love
your neighbor. . . ." But when we add the closing half of that statement,
"Love y01l1' neighbor ... as yourself," we uncover lilt' first
section of another problem area in right t relationships.
If some people loved their neighbors like they loved
themselves, the neighbors would be in trouble. "I hate myself. Wish I had
been a man. Wish I would have been a girl. Wish I were smart. Wish I were dumb.
I really don't like myself. I would rather be skinny. I would rather be fat. I
don't like my personality. I don't like my nose."
Now in this, we're getting down to a very deep-rooted
tendency in all of us. You see, when sin entered, it affected three areas: (1)
it affected our relationship between us and God. (2) It affected the
relationship between us and ourselves. (3) It affected the relationship between
us and others.
To say, "God, You're
great. I love You," we now have to add another dimension. We have to ask
the question: "Do I love myself?"
"No, not really."
"What's wrong?"
"Well, I don't like who I
am, where I'm at, or what I do. Besides that I have this thing called
self-rejection."
So the Lord has to deal with
all that and you get cleaned up inside and reconciled to yourself.
Eventually, we can say,
"Y' know something, Lord? You've done a pretty good job on Mumford. He's
not too bad anymore."
"Well, do you love him
now?" - "Well, I'm beginning to."
Then God says, "All right,
now are you ready for the third lesson?"
"What lesson is
that?"
He says, "We're going to
learn to love others.” (How many of you have learned that the Lord gives you
some people to practice on?)
Please don’t go out of here tonight without
understanding what I'm about to say, because many of you are in prison. Even
though you're saved, baptized with the Spirit, forgiven in the sense of having
salvation, you're in prison. You're not released to have the joy of the Lord
because you've got a real problem with resentment. That's the key. The
greatest single hindrance to spiritual maturity I know of is resentment. It
gets down inside of you, and sticks in you crosswise, and you can't do anything
with it.
There's hardly a believer that anticipates any
difficulty in receiving God's forgiveness. And yet there are times when we go
before the Lord, and cry big puddles of tears, and everything's right-except
that you are not right. You are not released. Then your growth
stops and your joy begins to wither.
So what do you do when your growth stops and your joy
starts to wither? Buy a bigger tambourine? What you do is you sing louder and
you pray longer. All the while the real need is to recognize that you've got resentment
in your spirit.
Finally, we recognize the
problem, and we respond, "God, do You mean I must go get it right?"
And He says,
"Exactly!" - "But You don't understand."
The Lord says, "I do
understand. That's why I dropped it into your heart."
You know where it dropped in,
don't you? Where were you when you discovered that resentment? At the altar.
You're at the altar and the
Lord says, “John.”
"Ouch! John? I don't want
to hear 'John.' Don’t want to hear that name at all."
And it comes again,
"John."
"Oh, I hate that name. You
know why I hate that name? John is the name of that business partner who
took me for $6,000. The Lord bless him - with a brick!"
Hearing God's reminder at the
altar is the first-step to healing your resentment.
Now, let's go back to Galatians, please, because I
want to show you something. Do you remember I said to you that righteousness
is relational? Jesus Christ came to get us rightly related to God the
Father. That's what He came for. But He also came to get us rightly related to
one another because the effect of righteousness is that we get rightly related
to everybody. Just like the Scripture says: "If it be possible, as much as
lieth in you, live peaceably with all men" (Rom. 12: 18).
Galatians 5:13 says, "You were called to freedom,
but use your freedom as an opportunity to love and serve
one another."
You say, "1 don't want to
serve one another. 1 want to serve God. God, why don’t You come down here
so I can cook You a steak?”
The Lord says, "You bring
your brother over to My house I've given you and cook him a steak.
You'll serve Me that way."
You say, "I'll eat the
steak myself."
Look at what Paul says in verse 15. 1 am thankful that
this happened in a New Testament apostolic church because this sounds like a
church in our town. "If you bite and devour one another .... " What
kind of problem were they having? Relational. Thy couldn’t get it together
relationally.
After tonight, when you start reading your Bible, you
will say, "1 wish 1 had never heard that message." You will discover
to your joy or dismay that relationships between you and yourself and
between you and your brother are basic, necessary and, as a result, are found
everywhere in God's Word.
Paul continues his commentary on the problems in the
Galatian church with verse 19: "The works of the flesh are evident."
Now we won't even bother with the first five because
they're really nasty: Immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry and sorcery.
We would never, never do anything like that – never.
We'll also take the last two – drunkenness and
carousing – and eliminate them because we don't get drunk and we don't carouse.
But stuck in the middle of those are eight relational problems, All
eight of the words describe problems having to do with relating to one another.
Here they are: Enmity. Enmity means ill-will, feelings
of ill-will. Have you ever in your life seen anybody walk through the door, and
as soon as you saw them walk in you didn't like them? They didn't even have to
open their mouths-you just didn't like them. You didn't like the way his hair
was combed! "We simply couldn't hit it off. I don't like her!"
Now let me just interject here, dear Christians; if
God intends to send all the people with these eight problems to hell, we've got
problems. Scripture doesn't say they'll go to hell, but it does say that they
won't come into their inheritance, and they'll miss the purposes of God.
So enmity is first. Then strife; the word
"rivalries" is also used here. Do you know what the Greek word means?
Outbursts of selfishness. Do you ever feel some mornings like.,.
"I'm tired of serving others. I'm going to live it up myself today. I
don't want to be with anybody. I want to go out on the beach by myself and be
there, just me."
After this, Paul lists jealousy, outbursts of anger,
disputes and dissensions.
Then factions or heresies. Do you know the Greek word
for heresy? It means simply a self-willed opinion. A heretic is a man who has
gotten a certain opinion, and he's going to hold onto it at all costs: "I
believe it; that's it.”
After that Paul includes envying. The word
"envying" means to be pained at what somebody else has. They drive up
in their new white Lincoln Continental with orange carpet and steam-heated
doorknobs. You look at it and say, through clenched teeth, "Oh, am I glad
God has blessed you." Envy is causing you pain, actual pain in your spirit
because of a work of the flesh.
I remember going into a pastor's home some years ago.
At the time we were living in a 27-foot trailer. When you closed the door, the
knob got in bed with you. We could sit at the kitchen table and reach in all
the cupboards. You never had to get up for anything. You could just reach up
and get it right out of the cupboard. So this pastor said, "Come over to
our house after the meeting." My wife and I, who were evangelists, walked
into his house and it was a castle. It had a white shag rug that was ankle
deep. I walked in and stood in the middle of that white shag rug in this
beautiful, spacious home, and I said, "OHHHH, God's been good to
you." Man, I wanted to burn it down. I was in pain. God nearly beat me to
death with that.
Now, what are those eight "works of the
flesh"? They are problems of relating-enmity and strife and
jealousy and anger and outbursts of temper.
Some of you have probably heard me tell of the time we
were going to a meeting one night in
These problems that Paul is citing are relational.
How do we get them all straightened out? For that matter, who wants to bother
getting it all straightened out? Who needs it? The Lord says,
"You need it." For the command we are given is: "Love your neighbour
as yourself"!
What exactly is resentment? Resentment means to
feel or to show displeasure at an act, person, remark or situation
from a sense of injury or insult. In other words, it's something
that hits you in a split second. You're doing fine, just walked out of a
meeting and everything's great. The Holy Spirit has been there, the Lord is
wonderful, and then you come out and see a big long mark dug into the side of
your new Chevrolet. One of the Christian brothers has backed out-right up the
side of your car. And you know what he did? He got out, took a piece of paper,
and wrote on it, and put it up under the windshield wiper. Do you know what he
put on the paper? "Everybody watching me write this thinks I am leaving
you my name and address. But I'm not." At that point you say,
"Listen, if I had known Christians could be like this ... Thanks a lot,
Lord – there I was in Your house praying and You were out here bending my
fender!"
Resentment occurs when God or somebody else does
something different than what you expected. When Naaman, captain of the entire
Syrian army, went to Elisha to get healed, in 2 Kings 5, he got a surprise. Now
Naaman was a man accustomed to being respected and obeyed.
He came thundering up to
Elisha's house with all his horses and chariots-a very impressive sight.
However, Elisha simply sent his servant out with a message: "Sir, my
master said. . . ."
Naaman said, "Wait a
second – who are you? You mean Elisha sent you to tell me ....”
"Yes sir.
He said if you just go down and dunk seven times in the
Naaman was furious and replied,
"I never heard such a thing as that. . . ."
But the chariot driver said,
"Sir, if he'd asked you something hard, you would have done it. Won't you
please do what the servant said?"
"OK, I will." He went
down to the
What was wrong with Naaman? What's the word? He was
filled with resentment. But the seventh time he came up healed! He didn't get
healed the sixth time.
I was in a meeting one night with a young black
evangelist, and a brother came up the aisle in evident pain. As the man was
coming forward to get prayed for, the young evangelist said, "Sir, stop
right there. Bend over three times and you'll be healed." Well, this man,
whom I personally knew, was immediately filled with resentment. He didn't want
to bend over! He wanted to have oil put on his head. As he stood there in the
middle of the aisle, you could see the inner struggle he was having because his
whole countenance changed. Meanwhile the evangelist just stood there. Finally
the man overcame his obvious resentment and yielded. He bent over - once,
twice, and then a third time. Each time he bent over, it was easier. The third
time the power of God hit him and healed three damaged vertebrae. The glory of
God rested on him for about three weeks. However, that resentment nearly caused
him to miss his healing and God's blessing.
Personally, I have come just as close to missing God
because of resentment. At times when God didn't do what I thought He ought to
do, I nearly missed it.
Let us examine the nature of resentment.
It's like this.
1. First, it's
subjective: nobody knows it but you and God. It might even be resting on you as
you hear this message. Without anyone knowing it, you might be sitting there
resentful that I'm preaching about resentment because you really wanted to hear
instead about the end-times.
2. Second,
it is the nature of resentment to become a personal "pity-party."
"Well, I owe it to myself. Nobody understands me, anyway."
3. Third, resentment
lodges in you as a grudge.
4. The fourth step is once it
becomes a grudge, you have a debtor. You are in debt to someone and
someone is in debt to you. Bill because you know about it, you must get
that debt paid. "Father, I ask You to forgive nw." How? "As I
forgive the debtors." The debtors are the people that failed you. Right
when you needed them, they didn't come through. But the resentment you hold
because of that is your problem.
Remember, it starts
subjectively. Nobody else may know it except you and God. You are sitting down
to eat supper in a restaurant and everybody else gets served a huge steak two
inches thick. When you get yours, it's the size of a silver dollar - for $7.95.
Someone says, "How's your
steak?" Covering up your feelings, you say, "Fine!"
But actually, the "pity-party" has started;
the grudge toward the restaurant, your host, and yourself has already taken
over. As soon as the grudge starts, you have a debtor. And if you leave that
grudge there, it will affect your relationship to God and others.
Some people hang onto so many grudges, and are so
numbed to any more, that adding one more to the stack doesn't seem to affect
them. These people are described in Ephesians 4: 18-19: "Having the
understanding darkened, being alienated from the life of God through the
ignorance that is in them, because of the blindness of their heart: Who being
past feeling have given themselves over unto lasciviousness, to work all
uncleanness with greediness."
How do you get released from resentment?
Well, there are four things you must know to get released
from resentment, or to prevent resentment.
1) Testing
è First you
have to understand what God means by "a testing." How many of you
know that the Bible says God will test us? That's right. . . He will.
Now let me tell you how He does
it. When He gets ready to test you, He always puts a sign up. Isn't that right?
He says, "Before you leave this meeting tonight, you will have a test.
When you go into the parking lot, your car will be bent down the side. Be thou
prepared." You say, "Thank you, Lord, for the warning.
Don't you wish it worked that
way'? Don’t you wish He would just say, "Mumford! Test is
coming." Unfortunately, He doesn't.
Now this is an example of a
test. You come home after working hard all day and sit down at the table.
"What's for supper, Honey'?"
"Huh? Oh, peanut butter
and jelly sandwiches." This is a test.
You say, "Oh, hallelujah!
I love peanut butter and jelly." I know one thing; that is a test! You
have to understand that God has the prerogative of permitting things to come
into your life to bring forth and reveal the depth of Christian maturity in
you. Remember the little lady in the Volkswagen I talked about? I don't think
that was an accident. Had I been driving an army tank, I would have solved that
problem!
2)
The Sovereignty of God
è Second, we
need a large dose of the sovereignty of God. That means, my dear brother and
sister, nothing can come into your life that doesn't first pass through the
hand of almighty God. Hear me! Everyone needs a dose of the sovereignty of God.
I say, "God, I don't understand this, but I know You're in it. "
Everyone of us needs to know that nothing, nothing, nothing touches our life
except it passes first through the permissive will of our Father.
I say, "Lord, You let it
come and I'll embrace it."
3)
Acceptance With Joy
è This third
one's the hardest one. It's called "acceptance with joy." You're
standing there, looking at your new Chevrolet station wagon with the four-foot
crease down the side. You say, "Hey, this is a test. God, You permitted
this? I accept it with joy. Ha, ha, ha, ha! Joy, joy! Where are you, joy? Come
on, now, spring up ... break forth ... I'm supposed to have joy. I can't leave
the parking lot until I find my joy. Where's the joy?"
The Lord says, "Do you
accept it?"
You say, "I accept
it." Now accepting it doesn't mean it's right; it doesn't mean others are
not to blame. It just means you are learning something about handling the
emergencies of life.
4)
Prison of Resentment
è The fourth
understanding you need is knowing about the
"jail." That is, if you don't handle a situation and it gets to be resentment, that dent in your car can be the beginning of
your losing out with God totally. It's what the Bible calls a "root of
bitterness. "
It starts off like a little weed of resentment.
"Is that the way Christians act? Dent your car and don't tell you about
it? Well, that's all right. If that's the way Christians want to play, then
I'll play the same way." If it goes that far, dear brother or dear sister,
you're in trouble.
Do you know that's the basic complication in marriage?
We fail to keep our resentments dealt with. "Honey, I resented you when
you gave me peanut butter and jelly." "Honey, I resented you when you
left this morning and you didn't empty the trash. I resented you. In fact, I
short-sheeted your bed."
I have a list of things here tonight that I felt God
wanted us to deal with together. I believe the Lord gave me this list of people
and situations where you and I have been guilty of harboring resentment for
many years-sometimes unknowingly, other times knowingly. When that happens, we
are not free to accept things as from the hand of God, and God shuts us up in a
spiritual prison and does not let us go on. That is what Hebrews 6:3 says-Let
us go on, if God permits. So don't think I'm talking humanistically now;
I'm speaking scripturally.
I believe the greatest hindrance to spiritual growth
is resentment. When we get it crosswise in our spirit, and we haven't dealt
with it, it becomes a hindrance. It will hang there until it turns into a root
of bitterness. First thing you know, you're a dried-up little old lady or a
miserable little old man – cynical and critical because something happened way
back when.
Resentment comes when God, or another, doesn't do what
you think He should. All right, now listen. We're going to go through these
items quickly and ask God to release us as people tonight. I know what's
there, I don't know you, but I know God, and I know people, and 1 know the
nature of resentment.
I)
Resentment Against God
The first thing we must find release from is resentment
against God. Do you know Thai people hold resentments against God for years
on end? "But, Brother Mumford, God let my mother die." What you're
saying is, God didn't do what you thought He ought to do, So resentment came up
in your spirit because God let your mother die. After you had prayed and
prophesied and after you had believed God for her healing, your mother died
anyhow. . . and then resentment came.
I've seen resentment build because God didn't heal
you. I've seen resentments build because God didn't do what you thought He ought
to do financially. Or because He didn't manifest spiritual gifts in your life
the way you thought He should. I've seen people resent God because they weren't
handsome or beautiful. I've seen them resent God because they were too tall or
too short or too dumb. Or because they were a man and wanted to be a woman, or
a woman and wanted to be a man. But the basic problem has been this: We have
refused to accept our portion in life from God with joy; and therefore we now
harbor deep resentments.
"Other people can have children, but I can't have
them. " "Other people have a husband, but I don't have a husband.
" "Other people .... " We wouldn't verbalize it-we wouldn't let
it come out-but it's there, residing deep within the halls of our souls.
"Other people are intelligent, but I can't add six numbers together."
"Other people can make bundles of money, but it seems like I'm shut up
breaking my back all my life." That's resentment rising up, basically
because you feel God has unfairly assigned you to certain circumstances.
2)
Resentment Against Our Pastor or Our
Shepherd
Oh, how many times we hold deep resentments because
he didn't come when we called him, or he didn't do it when we thought he
should.
3)
Resentment Against Our Family
"My father failed me." Personally, my
physical father really did fail me, and I had to forgive him nine times before
I truly got free. My own daddy.
Your father, your mother, your in-laws, out-laws, and
relatives-those that are around you-can injure you and hurt you like nobody
else can.
4)
Resentment Toward Our Boss
He has been unjust. He didn't give you a raise. That
other employee got ahead of you, even though you've been there longer and
you're the one who worked and labored and faithfully took care of all the
details. And yet the boss promoted him instead of you.
5)
Bitterness Toward Our Teacher
She failed you, gave you the wrong grades or the wrong
counsel.
6)
Bitterness Against Our Doctor or Surgeon
I counseled a girl one time who had had a surgeon
operate on her feet. He told her that after surgery, "You will be able to
walk normally." But after $8,000 and years of pain she ended up worse than
she had been before he operated on her. She was so full of resentment inside
that she couldn't go on with God, simply because of her resentment against a
man who had promised her one thing that didn't come to pass.
7)
Resentment of Our Business Partner
That one that used you. The business got going, and he
pushed you out. Or he manipulated and deceived you in some way so that the end
result of your business arrangement was that you came out on the short end of
the deal.
8)
Resentment Between Black Brothers and
White Brothers
The problem between black and white is one which God must
deal with. I have a precious black sister that I love as my very own daughter.
One day she grabbed her flesh and said, "Bob, you don't know what it's
like to live under black skin."
I said, "I know one thing. God better clean the
Church up of white resentments against black and black resentments against
white so that we can learn to love one another fervently and with a pure
heart."
9)
Resentments Between Roman Catholics and
Protestants
More and more we're fellowshipping and flowing with our
Catholic brothers and sisters, and they're flowing with us. But I still vividly
remember being taught as a kid on my little painted chair in Sunday School to
hate Catholics. "Be careful the Pope doesn't get you. "
The degree of hurt and injury and antagonism directed
towards each other for all of these years has been incalculable. Do you believe
God is able to heal that schism? He's going to do it, and He's going to deliver
you and me from secret hidden resentments whether it's Catholic against
Protestant or Protestant against Catholic.
I was in
10)
Resentment Between Democrat and Republican
I had an experience this very night that made this
very real. A group of brothers and sisters that love one another were
discussing a political issue and, suddenly, one of young ladies flared up
inside. We later discovered she was more of a liberal than the others and came
from a Democratic background. Because of political ideologies I saw resentment
rise up in a Christian against her brother.
Do you know that among Jesus' twelve disciples were
Simon, the Zealot, and Matthew, the publican? Simon, the Zealot, was the most
fanatical, political Jew that could possibly be. Matthew, on the other hand,
was an absolute sellout to the Roman government. He was a despised form of
humanity to the orthodox Jew. Here they were and Jesus said, "Listen,
Simon-come on. Matthew, come here. You two forget your resentments. Get your
act cleaned up, and let's get on down the road together."
11) Resentment Toward Communists
We must love them. You say, "Are you pink?"
"No, I'm a flag-waving American, that's my whole background." Some
years ago, I fought the communists and found myself full of resentment.
Ironically, I began to dislike and hate people-in the name of the Lord. But
then again, this does not mean I am a pacifist.
12) Bitterness Against Our Enemy
I dealt with a situation where a man had raped an
eight-year-old girl. The mother and the father had to come free of resentment.
The Bible says we must learn how to love our enemies. You know why?
Because you're not permitted to have resentment - even against your enemy. If
you do, pretty soon you're as bad off as your enemy. Maturity can be measured
by the manner in which you react to those classified as your enemy.
Now, to conclude this message, I would like to ask you
to put some names in the categories I have listed, so that you can forgive
those that you have resented. I'm believing God for a cleansing tonight,
beginning with us.
First we want to forgive God for the resentments
we've held against Him. "1 was too short. . . too tall ... too fat ... too
dumb. . . not pretty enough. . . I should have been a man. . . should have been
a woman." Or maybe you resent God for not moving you into ministry. Or you
resent Him for letting your marriage break up. You resent Him for not doing
what you thought He ought to do.
All right, now. I forgive You, God. I want You to
forgive me, but I also forgive You. Lord, I want to be cleansed of any
resentment I've held against You because You didn't heal my mother, or my father;
because You didn't bring the finances in, or the prophecy didn't come true.
I've secretly held resentment against You all of these years, but Lord, 1 want
You to know 1 forgive You tonight. God, You've forgiven me and I forgive You.
I want you to forgive your pastor or shepherd.
Forgive him tonight for what he did or didn't do. Maybe it's not your present
pastor or shepherd; maybe it's the one before or the one before that. The one
that ran off or got involved sexually and offended you. He hurt you. 1 want you
to forgive him tonight. Forgive your pastor. Put his name right in that slot
and tell God you forgive him. Lord God, 1 forgive my shepherd, my pastor, for
failing me in one of those situations. Whatever he did, Lord, 1 forgive him
tonight. 1 release my resentment against him. Father, 1 forgive.
Father, 1 forgive my earthly mother and father. She
failed me, God. She taught me wrong. She messed up my life. She didn't do to me
or for me what 1 thought she should, but she was my mother and You told me to
honor her. Lord, 1 forgive my mother tonight for the resentments I hold against
her. 1 forgive my father, too. When 1 needed a father, he was gone or occupied
or just didn't care. But 1 forgive him tonight in the name of Jesus.
Lord, release me from the resentment in my spirit of
mother against daughter ... daughter against mother. Or son against daddy or
daddy against son. They may not even be present with you but you know you've
held that resentment for years; and now God wants it to drop at your feet like
a used gaI1nent. He wants the chains to fall off your life.
Lord, 1 forgive my relatives – brothers and sisters,
aunts and uncles and others that are around me now or that 1 grew up with.
1 forgive my boss tonight, the one that employed me or
fired me or got me into a situation 1 thought was unfair and unjust.
Right now, husband, release the resentment you have
held toward your wife. Wife, release the resentment you've held against him for
not being what you thought he ought to be. And each of you say, "I forgive
my mate in Jesus' name."
1 forgive my teacher-the one who instructed me wrong
or did something that brought confusion into my situation. 1 forgive my doctor,
my surgeon, my lawyer, my dentist, my business partner. Lord, 1 forgive him for
the business deal he brought into my life that caused me such pain. 1 release
him from the resentments I've held against him all these years.
Father, 1 want You to cleanse me for the feelings 1
have of black against white or white against black. 1 want You to cleanse me
tonight.
God, cleanse me of any kind of hidden, secret
prejudices that are present in my spirit. The Catholic/Protestant kind of
bitterness. Jesus, forgive us and cleanse us of any resentments against
Catholics or Protestants or any bitterness against Democrats or Republicans,
the conservatives or liberals. Jesus, I ask You tonight to cleanse us from
hidden resentments that stand against Your people, Father, that cause us to
lash out at Your people.
We want to forgive the denominational, doctrinal
resentments we've held against one another. Forgive the Baptists, forgive the
Presbyterians, forgive the Lutherans, forgive the Seventh Day Adventists. Just
forgive all those you've held grudges against because you thought something was
done wrong or abused or misused.
The problem with resentment is in you tonight,
dear brother or dear sister. Let Jesus cleanse it. Let the blood of Jesus
Christ, God's Son, cleanse you from all unrighteousness. And if we have
committed any sin, He shall forgive that. If we confess our sins, He is
faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and cleanse us from all
unrighteousness.
Let the Lord replace your resentment and bitterness
with love and the other fruit of the Spirit. All the fruit of the Spirit is
relational, too. The fruit isn't for God; the fruit is for the weary traveler,
the people nearest to you. They want to come up to your life and pick the fruit
of patience.
They say, "You know something, Brother Bob? You
are so patient with me."
"Well, I'll tell you where I got that. I grew it
in my little garden. Go ahead and pick one. There aren't many of them."
Listen, as long as resentment is there, there is no
room for fruit to grow. So we live a barren existence because bitterness and envy
and jealousy and strife crowd out the fruit of the Spirit, preventing right
relationships from developing.
I want us to close by praying the Lord's Prayer and I
want to ask that we do it tonight with a new depth of meaning, especially the
phrase, "Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors."
Our Father which art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come. Thy will be
done in earth, as it is in heaven.
Give us this day Our daily
bread.
And forgive us our debts, as we
forgive our debtors.
And lead us not into
temptation, but deliver us from evil:
For thine
is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory for ever. Amen.
Background
of the Author
Called
as a teacher to the Body of Christ, Bob has traveled widely, in t erpreting the
Born
in
Bob
married Judy Huxoll while attending
Bob
has served as pastor, evangelist and seminar teacher, as well as Dean and
Professor of Bible at Elim Bible Institute in
Sito Web: http://www.lifechangers.org